You Have Permission to Have Fun
Jun 23, 2026
There are seasons where healing starts to feel like another job.
You are noticing patterns, learning new tools, and responding differently. Working on your body. Working on your thoughts and your nervous system. Working on your relationships.
And all of that matters.
And sometimes we can get so focused on the work that we forget healing was never meant to become another place where we lose our joy.
We forget to laugh and play.
We forget to enjoy the small things that bring our hearts back online.
We forget to ask, “What would actually feel fun today?”
And if you have lived in survival for a long time, fun may not be the first thing you think of. But what if fun is not separate from your healing?
What if fun is one of the ways your body begins to remember connection?
Most people think of fun as something we do after everything else is handled.
After the work is done and the stress is gone.
After the healing is complete.
When life feels easier.
But when your nervous system has spent years scanning for danger, waiting for the next hard thing, or living in a constant state of readiness, fun can become part of learning a new way to live.
In this episode of the Be a Blaze Podcast, I talk about what happens when survival becomes normal, why fun matters in the healing journey, and how small moments of connection, curiosity, and joy can help us experience ourselves and our lives in a different way.
🎧 Listen to podcast Episode 49: Are We Having Fun Yet?
When Your Body Is Used to Watching for Danger
If you have experienced trauma, chronic stress, or painful seasons that taught you the world was not safe, your body may have learned how to stay on alert.
That alertness can be helpful in moments of real danger. But it was never meant to become the way you live every day.
When survival becomes your normal, you may find yourself constantly reading the room, anticipating someone’s reaction, preparing for something to go wrong, or feeling like you cannot fully relax.
You may fight.
You may freeze.
You may shut down.
You may people please.
You may try to fix everyone else’s emotions so you can feel okay.
Those responses are not random. They are protective patterns. And when you begin to recognize them, you also begin to see that there may be another way to respond.
That is where choice starts to come in.
You get to notice, “Wait, am I reacting from survival, or am I responding from connection?”
That question matters. Because connection is where life begins to open back up.
Healing Is Not Meant to Keep You in Work Mode
There is a kind of focus that is beautiful and necessary.
Sometimes we need to look at the hard things and do the deep work. Sometimes we need to set boundaries, tell the truth, and make new choices.
But if we are not careful, healing can become another form of striving.
Another checklist.
Another thing to accomplish.
Another place where we tell ourselves we are not there yet.
And that is not the heart of this work. The goal is not to become endlessly focused on what is wrong. The goal is to become more awake, more connected, more alive, and more able to experience the life that is actually in front of you.
Fun helps with that.
Not because it fixes everything. But because it interrupts the belief that life is only about managing pain, solving problems, or getting through the next thing.
Fun Belongs in the Connected Part of You
There is fun that brings life, and there is fun that only gives a quick hit.
Some things we call fun may actually leave us more disconnected, more numb, more depleted, or more out of alignment with who we are becoming. That's not the kind of fun I am talking about.
I am talking about the kind of fun that helps you feel present.
The kind that wakes up curiosity.
The kind that lets your body soften.
The kind that brings you back into the moment.
The kind that reminds you that there is still goodness here.
Sometimes that kind of fun is big and adventurous.
And sometimes it is very, very simple.
For me, it can look like going outside, watering flowers, watching what is growing, counting caterpillars on my passion vine, sitting in the sunshine, laughing with people I love, playing with my dogs, or going paddleboarding even when the wind turns it into a much bigger adventure than expected.
Fun does not have to be impressive or expensive. It doesn't have to take all day.
It just needs to bring life.
You Have Permission to Pause
I want to say this clearly: You have permission to pause.
If you have been doing the work, showing up, learning, healing, changing, and paying attention, I am so proud of you.
And you also get to breathe. You get to pause for a moment and let your body experience something good. A pause does not mean you're quitting or going backward. It doesn't mean you are ignoring what matters.
It means you are consciously choosing to stop long enough to reconnect.
Maybe that pause is an afternoon.
Maybe it is one day.
Maybe it is five minutes outside.
Maybe it is turning on music.
Maybe it is laughing at something ridiculous.
Maybe it is doing something that has no purpose except enjoyment.
It all counts. Your healing does not fall apart because you let yourself have a moment of joy. Sometimes that moment of joy is part of what helps you keep going.
Write Down 50 Ways to Have Fun
One of the simplest things you can do is make a list.
Write down 50 things that feel fun, life-giving, playful, peaceful, silly, creative, adventurous, or enjoyable to you.
Not what should be fun. Not what looks good online or what someone else would pick. Your list.
Some can involve other people.
Some can involve your family.
Some can involve your friends.
Some can involve your pets.
And some can be things you do completely alone. That part matters. If fun always depends on someone else being available, you may miss the ways your own heart is trying to reconnect with you. So let yourself get curious.
What did I love when I was little?
What makes me laugh?
What helps me feel awake?
What can I do in my backyard?
What can I do in five minutes?
What can I do without spending money?
What can I do when I am tired?
What can I do just because I enjoy it?
Write the list. Then choose something from it. Don't let it stay theoretical. Let yourself practice.
Let Fun Change the Lens
When you begin making room for connected fun, something starts to shift. You begin to see that life is not only something to survive.
It is not only responsibility and healing. Not only the next hard conversation or the next hard thing to work through.
There is still beauty, laughter and curiosity. There are small moments that can remind your body, “We are not only here to brace. We are also here to live.”
So this week, ask yourself: What am I going to do today that is fun?
Maybe it is small. Maybe it is quiet. Maybe it only takes five minutes.
Make space for it. Let your body experience it.
And have a beautiful, blazy, fiery, fun day.