Learning to Cheer Yourself On

Sometimes growth feels energizing. You notice the changes you're making, you feel connected to where you're going, and there is a sense that all of this work is actually leading somewhere. 

And then there are seasons when everything just feels heavier.

I've talked with quite a few people lately who describe themselves as stuck. They were moving forward, making changes, learning about themselves, and then something seemed to slow down. When that happens, it is so easy to start picking ourselves apart. We look for everything we're doing wrong, become frustrated by what hasn't changed yet, and forget how much has already happened.

There is absolutely a time to look at patterns, gather information, and become curious about what may be keeping us stuck. But sometimes we don't need another analysis of ourselves.

Sometimes we need encouragement.

And eventually, one of the most powerful voices of encouragement in your life can become your own.

This week on the Be a Blaze Podcast, we're doing something a little different. Instead of focusing on another problem to solve, I'm inviting you to slow down, reconnect with yourself, and remember the strength, brilliance, individuality, and fire that already exist within you.

The goal isn't for you to depend on me or anyone else to keep reminding you of your worth. It's to begin recognizing what is already inside you, learning how to encourage yourself from that place, and becoming your own greatest cheerleader.

🎧 Listen to podcast Episode 56:  Ignite Your Inner Blaze - Becoming Your Own Cheerleader

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Sometimes You Need Encouragement, Not Correction

Think about what happens at the end of a close game when the players are exhausted. They don't need someone standing on the sidelines listing everything they did wrong. They need energy. They need someone reminding them that the game isn't over yet.

We need that in life too. Healing, changing old patterns, learning boundaries, caring for our bodies, and becoming more conscious of how we live all require energy. There will be times when we become tired of working on ourselves, especially when the changes we hoped to see aren't happening as quickly as we imagined.

Encouragement doesn't mean pretending everything is wonderful. It means remembering that difficulty does not erase progress.

Feeling discouraged today does not mean you're back at the beginning.

Sometimes you simply need to stop measuring yourself for a moment and remember who you are.

Notice What Is Hard for You to Receive

One of the most interesting things about encouragement is noticing which words are easy to accept and which ones immediately create resistance.

Someone might tell you that you're strong, intelligent, worthy, creative, funny, loving, or capable. Maybe some of those feel completely true. Then one word lands differently and your mind immediately begins building a case against it.

Pay attention to that.

Rather than forcing yourself to believe something that feels impossible, become curious about the resistance. If being told you're worthy makes you uncomfortable, what have you learned about worth? If being called intelligent makes you want to explain all the ways you aren't, what definition of intelligence have you been carrying?

The places where encouragement is hardest to receive can tell us quite a bit about the stories we've been living from.

There Is More Than One Kind of Brilliance

We have created some incredibly narrow definitions of intelligence and success. For many people, those definitions began in school. Good grades meant smart. Struggling academically often created a very different story.

But human brilliance is so much bigger than a report card.

Maybe you have an incredible ability to understand people. Maybe you notice patterns others miss, create beautiful things, solve complicated problems, make people laugh, communicate ideas, build businesses, care for people, or imagine possibilities no one else has considered.

Those abilities are not lesser forms of intelligence simply because they weren't measured on a test.

And if you did thrive academically, celebrate that too. You worked for those accomplishments. Just be curious if achievement ever became the place where you learned to find your worth or earn acceptance.

We can honor what we're good at without requiring it to prove who we are.

You Can Encourage Others Without Emptying Yourself

Some of the best encouragers I know are incredible at seeing greatness in other people. They speak life into everyone around them, show up when someone is struggling, and seem to know exactly what someone else needs to hear.

But sometimes those same people are exhausted.

If you have spent years people pleasing, caretaking, managing emotions, or trying to keep everyone around you okay, encouragement can quietly become another way of seeking safety. You give and give because somewhere inside there may be a hope that if everyone else is okay with you, then you can finally feel okay too.

Healthy encouragement doesn't require that exchange. I can see something beautiful in another person, speak it, and let it belong to them. Their response doesn't determine my emotional state.

And I can learn to do the same for myself.

You Are Allowed to Be Your Own Person

Becoming your own cheerleader also means becoming more comfortable with your individuality. You are allowed to have beliefs, preferences, ideas, and boundaries that someone else may not understand.

You are even allowed to change your mind.

Changing your mind because you've learned something new isn't weakness. Being willing to consider new information, question an old belief, and choose differently can be evidence that you're thinking critically instead of simply protecting an identity you've outgrown.

As we become more connected to ourselves, disagreement doesn't have to feel like rejection. We can listen to other people without surrendering ourselves to them. We can communicate clearly without convincing everyone to agree, and we can set boundaries without needing unanimous approval.

That is a very different way of living than constantly looking outside ourselves to determine whether we're okay.

Change the Voice You Hear From Yourself

If you've spent years speaking critically to yourself, encouragement may feel awkward at first. You might even worry that you're letting yourself off the hook.

You're not.

Encouragement isn't ignoring reality. It is learning to tell the truth without using cruelty as motivation.

You can acknowledge that you're struggling and also remember that you've made it through hard things before. You can recognize a mistake without turning it into an identity. You can be disappointed with an outcome while still being proud that you tried. You can have areas of your life that need attention and still genuinely like who you are.

Think about how you would speak to someone you deeply love if they were tired and discouraged. More than likely, you wouldn't remind them of every failure they've ever had. You would help them remember what they couldn't see in that moment.

You deserve to learn how to offer yourself that same kindness.

Let Your Body Learn Encouragement Too

Encouragement isn't only something that happens in our thoughts. Our bodies experience it too.

Think about a time when you felt genuinely proud, excited, playful, strong, or completely free to be yourself. Maybe your posture changed. Maybe you smiled without realizing it. Maybe you felt lighter, warmer, or more energized.

Those experiences matter because we can practice returning to them. When frustration or disappointment begins taking over, we can pause, breathe, reconnect, and remind our bodies that there are other ways to experience the moment.

Over time, this becomes part of building trust with ourselves. We aren't waiting until life feels easy to access joy, confidence, encouragement, or peace. We are learning how to cultivate those experiences from within.

Your Blaze Is Still There

If you've been feeling stuck lately, I hope you stop interpreting that as proof that you've somehow lost your way. You may be tired. You may need rest. You may need to look at something differently. You may even discover another pattern that deserves your attention.

But none of that erases who you are or how far you've come.

Your fire does not have to be roaring every day to still exist. Sometimes it is a quieter flame that needs a little care. Instead of criticizing it for not being bigger, protect it. Feed it. Remind yourself of the things that make you feel alive.

Learn to notice what is good in you without immediately qualifying it. Celebrate the things you've worked hard for. Speak to yourself with the same enthusiasm you so freely offer to the people you love.

And when you catch yourself waiting for someone else to tell you that you're doing okay, see what happens when you become the voice you've been waiting to hear.

Cheer yourself on. Your blaze is still there.